Ahead

I remember this day like it was yesterday. the feeling of being physically on top of the world but mentally at rock bottom. i just graduated college and my mom forced me to go to GA to stay with my grandma the day after my big graduation party.

i hadn’t been to their house since my grandfather passed and was so scared i would feel empty, but moms and God know best.

Hiawassee, GA has always been holy ground for me. something in the air makes me feel safe. the memories there make me feel loved. the people there have always made me feel seen.

it was a heavy 2 weeks, filled with lots of alone time and confusion about where God wanted me to go next. i feel sad for that me, the me that believed she would never be enough. it was a season of being broken and i was scared it would get the best of me.

i look back now, 4 years later, and see how much God had prepared for me. He was making room for my future. this beautiful life filled with pursuit and love.

today a pastor said to me, don’t let the fog stop you from moving forward - allow the Holy Spirit to guide you.

i know sometimes life feels foggy, like where do we go next? or how will i get there? but I feel called to remind you to slow down and that you are doing fine. Don’t rush things like healing. Fog can’t last forever. Bare down, close your eyes and trust the hand that created you to lead you fiercely into the unknown.

so many times I wanted my feet planted in places God hadn’t soiled yet. I wanted to be so many versions of myself and do so many things when all i had to be was present. your time is already here and your time is ahead.

sometimes being on top of the world can lead to one day feeling on top of it.

i don’t have it even half way together. i live my life everyday prayerful that i am walking into what He has or me now and next.

head up and heart prepared. messy, loved, and trying.

standing in the fog with you - whispering that you don’t have to be anything but you. & reminding you the sun is set to shine soon.

xo